Italia Vogue = Black Models

Hey ladies,

I have been meaning to post this, but you know I am lazy. Anyway. Please make sure you get the new Italia Vogue - July issue. It is an all black issue. Here is a story on it.

There has been a huge drop off of black models in fashion magazines and the runway and this magazine is going ALL black. It will drop tomorrow here in the states.

I will not tell you that I ran around like crazy last week in 3 1/2 inch heels trying to get this magazine because I thought it dropped last Thursday (came out in Europe) and I HAD to have it. I went to many Magazine places in the city thinking they carried it, but nope. So, I went to old faithful Borders and yup, they carried it, but did not have the July issue on the stands. DAMN my toes.

Anyway, I will be getting two prints - one I can thumb through and one as a collectors item because it is no telling when this will happen again.

SPREAD THE WORD!!!

Party time!! Go Urban! Go Urban!

Ya'll I am getting down at my desk, with my door closed of course. THANK GOODNESS IT IS FRIDAY!!! Want to party with me? Well. I was at my desk and was singing some Go-Go and decided to check You.Tube to see if any was on there and sure nuff it was. If you are from the AREA you know what I am talking about. Love some Chuck Brown and you know people are playing the Godfather at all the cookouts. But let's bring it to the youngins and make me feel like I am in the club again.

Here is a taste.

WELCOME TO D.C., THE DMV or the AREA!!




I am feeling this one too. I'm Classy not Trashy!! Oh and when she hit him with boy please you lookin ragedy, my favorite part!

My Phatty!! Yup it's my phatty!!

Pieces of Me by Ashley Simpson but Go-Go Version

I think I need to go to the club!!! My husband hates go-go and he is a native Washingtonian - except for Chuck Brown, everyone loves Chuck.

They had some Chuck online but not any good audio really so I will definitely have to download some.

Urbanknitrix - email conversation with friend

THANK YOU for letting me vent. I have had some time to Relax, Relate, Release. Although, I am still upset. I guess it is not enough kids dying accidentally. But moving on.

EMAIL CONVERSATION: Excuse the ebonics, two ole friends chatting.

BFF Email: Girl, I made a big mistake. Do you remember Retardo?
Urb Response: Yes, what did you do?
BFF Email: I’m not saying.....You know.LOL
Urb Response: Whatever, what? How did you hook back up with Retardo?
BFF Email: Girl, we have been talking. I just didn't tell you. SORRY BOO
Urb Response: How did he/you find him? I thought he left the state or something. You are off the hook.
BFF Email: Girl, he never left and we have been hanging out. sometimes he take me to lunch or dinner when i have time on my hands. one thing led to another.
Urb Response: How long have yall been dating? I thought he fell off the face of the earth.
BFF Email: Girl, its not really dating. i don't know what it is? he has changed his ways though. A LOT!! HE ask me all the time to go out but i don't be having a sitter like that. Girl, he is a different person.

People always seek advice from me. Not bragging, just the truth, friends, strangers, etc. I asked a friend before why and she said she knows I will give it to her straight. No cut cards and not maliciously. I will listen to you, cry and withhold judgment until you ask for it. Anywho, let’s get back to the program.

Will you date your ex after he tried to have you arrested for harassment and stalking? I mean what’s really hood! I know we all do stuff. I just do not understand when you have kids.

About 4 or 5 years ago, my bff dated this fool who was older and married. His wife was supposed to been dying and authorized this (I do not care if I am on my deathbed it ain’t happen). No, I do not believe it, but I have heard of arrangements like this. Anyway, he was older and very controlling. You know the type want to give a little young thing money and you have to stand at attention and look pretty when he asked. Well, she got tired and broke up with him. A very rocky on again, off again relationship. Then one day out the blue, she brings him up and they were “just friends”. Wife still living, okay. She gets a phone call from a girl – NOT HIS WIFE. They talk of course. Compare notes and low and behold, he has proposed to this chick, she has a wedding ring and all and wife still here mind you. The other chick called ole dude and told him what was going on. He called and cursed my friend out and told her not to call the chick. Well they kept talking.

Now ladies (gent are you there?), I am only going by hearsay, because we are known to do crazy things. My friend called me hysterical. Boyfriend filed harassment charges against her, which are very serious. The police came to her house and served her papers. She of course countered the same thing. They had to go to court. However, before they could make it to court, he called her and told her do not worry about she did not have to show up, it did not mean anything. I told her, you had better get your ass to court, what if he is lying. Well it all came out good in the end because he did not show up and it was dropped. Oh one more thing, her dad is a Reverend and this fool called her house when she was living with her parents and told them that he was the father of her daughter. He is not, but can you imagine what she went through with her dad, mom and the bible. It was not a good look.

I know people can change but it is not THAT much changing in the world. Just my opinion, what is yours? Oh and did you catch that last snippet about not having a baby sitter. OH WELL.

I AM SO PISSED RIGHT NOW!!!!!

Man I am so heated. ****Warning*** Plenty of cursing and grammatical mistakes.

I can't believe this shit. They (The Suppose to Be Supre.me Cou.rt) just fucked the citizens of D.C. more. Oh my freaking GOD. As if we needed more guns on the streets of D.C. I just don't understand it. I am against guns PERIOD.

It just makes no sense to me, a nation with so many guns and so much crime. What burns me the most is that the person who originally filed a suit against D.C. don't even live/work in D.C. I mean WHAT THE FUCK!!!

I am just so pissed right now. I was hoping for a better outcome when it went to the Supre.me Court. But I was delusional as usual ESPECIALLY SINCE SOME ON THE COURT ARE HUNTERS!!!!! FUCK ME!!!!!

I just can't believe this shit!! This is such a huge blow. And don't give me that shit about how you can go through checks and all that shit and its your right. Maybe so, but why do you need AK47s your ass is not hunting bear.

Just ridiculous. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

What's in Your Fridge Pantry

Well, well, well. I was tagged by Patrice to do the "What's In Your Fridge/Pantry.."
Here are the rules.

1. Post the rules before the pictures/descriptions.
2. Take a few shots of what's hiding in your fridge..freezer...pantry...cupboards. The more the better.
3. You can either simply just include the pictures or even better give some description of what's in there...your favorites...where you shop..how (or how not) it's organized...and/or whatever else you want to include. The more info the better...yes...I like details!
4. NO tidying up! If you want to turn around things so you can see the labels thats fine...but no re-arranging or cleaning things up. The whole point is to see things the way they actually are...naturally. If there is nothing in your fridge show that... Just keep it real!

Keep the tag going. Pick 7 other bloggers to join in on the fun and tag them by including their names after your post and by leaving a comment on their blog letting them know they have been tagged. I think it would also be great if you would let the person who tagged you know once you have posted your pictures.


I have to have my eggs when I bake or whatever, that is why that is 54 eggs (2 packs of 18 for like 2 dollars and some change.) Big ass bottle of condiments to last 20 cookouts.


Pantry again and Multi peppers and Beefsteak tomatoes.


Big ass bottle of Oil, and Trash Bags (I have not bought trash bags in 3 months). In the Freezer gotta have the Freeze Pops - do yall remember them?


Homemade Apple Pie (Granny Smith apples are the best) and Fresh Rosemary and EVOO Baked Red Potatoes.



Let me start off by saying that I shop at Cost.co and I use my cellphone camera, which means blurry pics and big items. I LOVE Cost.co I try and convert everyone, you would think I had stock in the place. You just can not beat the prices, although you might want to stay far away from the fresh fruits and veggies. I can not cosign that. Your veggies and fruits should not look like they could not get a long and have been fighting AND lost. Damn. Just can't eat that (Normally go to the market). However, I do get some like the tomatoes and the assorted peppers, I can not beat the price anywhere else. In D.C. You pay a arm and a back (sometimes a left butt cheek) for assorted peppers and I ain't having it. I got that bag for a little over $5. For six peppers red, yellow and orange. The tomatoes would have been a steal if I didn't have to throw them in the trash because of the chemicals certain people are putting in our food. I will be growing my own next year.

Whose up next?

Up to you. It was fun, although I forgot to do the spice cabinet and another secret cabinet.

Mr. Stefon, the kids working and the Hulk

First off, let me begin by saying THANK YOU for making me feel like a KNITTER. As I said before, this pattern is really easy – TRUST, if I can do it any body can. So get them needles, patterns, yarn, and get to knitting!

My family is big movie watchers. When The Hulk came out the first time, we all HATED it. We told every one not to see that movie! I was hurt because the green man was my bun coming up. Therefore, when we heard there was going to be another we were not too happy….until, the husband and I found out Big Ed was going to be in it. WE LOVE ED NORTON. ***Sidebar***Ed Norton is the business. He is so versatile, I do not even want to start naming what I like him best in because too many! In addition, if I see him in person the husband better watch out, I might know his ass over trying to get to him. Okay, I woke up.

The movie was great, we are still talking about it today and we saw it Friday, before Anger Mgmt graduation (Yes we squeezed in; I tried to convince her that it was her gift but she was not having it).

Anger Mgmt and College Boy are working this summer. Anger Mgmt do not want to work she has been trying to get out of working since her dad told her last year, that that was her last summer of loafing. College Boy is used to it he has been working since the 9^th grade as well, although she thinks its unfair because this is her 8^th grade summer (I did not tell her to be born in January, well…I guess, never mind). She text me on Monday telling me she is bored. I text her back and said it was money. Homegirl, text me back and said so. All I could do was laugh.

Mr. Stefon got dealt with on Monday. Why you ask? The hell if I know, he keeps pushing the buttons.

On Saturday, I decide to bake a cake and have him help because he is always yapping about how grandma let him do xyz. I let him help. However, we did not ice the cake or decorate it. He came to me later and asked me to do it I told him no, maybe tomorrow. I had every intentions of doing it on Sunday, but it was Father’s Day, so another day goes by. Well, on Monday, after running the kids and all that I cook dinner and look at the cake. WHY SOMEONE PINCH THE CAKE? I said what the hell? Mr. Conservative comes in there asking what is wrong, dying laughing because we all know who did it.

ME: I already know who did this crap. SSSSSSTTTTTTEEEEFFFFFOOONNN

Stefon: Ha?

ME: What happened to my cake?

S: (he says nothing looks down shame faced)

M: DID YOU TOUCH MY CAKE?

S: Yes

M: Why?

S: I don’t know?

I will not incriminate myself in this post, but TRUST, Mr. Stefon got dealt with!!!

But hold up, why he ask me for money the next day and some cake. Boy please you will not get NADDA. I am sorry I do not believe in rewarding crap like that, not at all. I ain’t the meanest mother, but I am not your friend either.

What was Mr. Conservative doing during all this? CRACKING UP! I mean, rolling on the floor. The other two were just shaking their heads, like, we never did anything like that. I looked at College Boy and said boy please, you used your damn shovel to cut my cake when you were little!

Wish me luck, I am going to a interview to get Mr. Stefon in a tennis program for the summer, maybe he will use up some energy.

Hemlock Ring Blanket

Hemlock Ring Blanket
Started: May 2, 2008
Ended: June 14, 2008
Yarn: Cascade Eco 2 skeins (not all of the 2^nd skein)
Needles: US size 10 1/2

Ain’t that a blip, you know I hate conforming, but I had to with this baby, too pretty to write my regular, this pattern, and this yarn. See. I know how to act sometime.

Okay, back to the project. I love this lapghan. I originally was making this for my FIL for daddy’s day, but I think it is kinda girly. He is a suave, cool, dude, but I do not think this will look good on his sofa. I will knit him something else.

Starting this project was a hassle. I ordered a deeper brown yarn from WEBS, but as soon as I ordered, someone came in the store and took the last, and then I switch to a lighter brown – same thing. I was ready to quit ya’ll, but I really wanted to tackle this blanket. And I am glad I did, I got a lighter yarn, and I am so happy I knitted this beauty. My kids and husband love it. My mom likes it too, which is saying a lot. So, this baby needs to find a home because it is too light for my living room (kids). I think I may give it to my mom or my Great Aunt.

This is a really easy knit, as long as you pay attention on certain rounds. A fast knit as well. It took me awhile, because I was reading The Pillars of the Earth 800 + pages and it was ssooooo good. So, I would read and knit like 4 rows a day, other than that you could definitely bang it out. As a gift this would be cute, but would the recipient want to pin it out and block it after? I wonder, because this would be great Xmas gifts.

Anger Mgmt get's top honors and the dress

Graduation

My chest is poked out y’all. Ms. Anger Management received the top score is her class. SHE WAS NUMERO UNO!!!! We were/are so proud of her.

Prom/Dance

The dance was nice. When she got dressed with the hair and all that, she looked awesome. Also, that is when I realized my baby isn’t so much a baby any more, she is turning into a beautiful young lady. Damn.

THE DRESS:

We went online to buy her original dress and we found out her dress was out of stock tell August. Well, we were up shit creek then because she can’t stand pink (I think I traumatized her when she was a baby), she loves blue and all the stores we went to had pink. Time was running down and then she went on the Honors trip so I could not get anything with out her consent (because I was still finding dresses in pink – its her color!). When she got back home I showed her the dresses I saw and she was none too happy, but at the same time we had to get something. My budget was $200.00 (folks, I was not trying to spend that AT ALL), I figured that was the going rate for the dresses. Well, I call the shop and ask do they have the dress and they said yup and we got chucking to the burbs. When we get there she do not look at the dress because it is multicolored and she see blue dresses. Well while she was trying on those dresses I got the sales girl to get the dress I called about, it was on the mannequin. My husband agreed that was the better dress. Any who, she shows me the contenders and she didn’t like them because they showed her boobage. One thing I like about my daughter is she haven’t discovered her body yet. She is a brick house and do not know it. She hate showing her legs, she will only wear Bermuda shorts, they have to come to her knees (for how long, not much). When she tried on my dress she looked beautiful in it, everyone told her and she kept saying, I don’t know because it is too short. I said well lets ask Dad and he said it was just fine. STAMP of APPROVAL (no cutouts) - 24.99 people.

THE SHOE: Now we go look for the shoes, I said why don’t we go to payless you don’t wear heels and this is a one time thing. We go there and they have shoes for 19.99, I said hell no. If we are going to pay that much, we might as well spend a little extra and go to Macy’s. We are walking down and we see some shoes (can’t remember the shop, but one of those teens, young adult shops) and we go in. I see some gold shoes for 29.99 and am like way to much for this store, but I am tired and she could fit them. We go to the register and the shoes were FIVE DOLLARS. Could not believe my luck.

THE BAG: I thought I had a gold clutch at home, but it was chrome – damn. We go out on the day of the dance after getting our hair and nails did. Mr. Conservative took us to Pentagon City and we ended up at Macy’s and we found a Gu.ess clutch which looked more her age for $59.99. I wasn’t mad at the price because I got such great deals with the dress and the shoes. Got to the register and magic happened again. The bag was 19.99.

So, everything came to $49.98. It’s my burday!!!

OH HELL TO THE NAW!!!

Did he really say she is not the boss of him and more? Ain't no damn way. I am sorry, I believe kids have rights, but damn, he would not have got into the first minute of a convo. You do not raise your voice at me at all. Discussion are civil especially with your kids. I can honestly say I would not be here right now, if I would have stepped to my mom like that; furtermore, if it was my kids, I would be writing this blog from a jail cell, inmate number 666666.



I still don't get it - why isn't she telling a story from her jail cell? This should be a Snapped Episode. And this video would be used as evidence for the defense. I probably would get off if I could stack the deck with a jury of my "peers". Ya dig!!

WHATEVER and a big NO Ma'am.

Bathing Suits: Conversations between Mr. Conservative and Anger Mgmt

My baby is back!!!

Miss Anger Management just returned from a weekend in Rehoboth Beach, which was very big. Her school took seven honor students. Originally, they were supposed to go to Puerto Rico, but parents did not want their children leaving the country. Understandable. Hell, I did not want mine to leave the house. This is her first away trip. She has only been allowed to go to her Grandma’s house and two aunts. That is it. No spending a night over friend’s house. Nada. Well, she is growing up. My little young lady, and as usual I do have a story to tell. We went shopping for bathing suits and the child has always had a one piece ALWAYS, even as a bambino. While we were shopping 50 million stores, on the 51^st we were dog tired and determined this would be the last store so she had better find something. Well they really did not have anything and then she says this suit is okay and the conversation between her and Mr. Conservative went something like this –

Anger Mgmt: Well, I do not see anything. I might as well get this one mommy (I normally fight for her, if her dad is unreasonable.).
Mr. Conservative: Let ME see? (He is not stupid she said it too quick and specified me)
AM: This one.
MC: Girl, you funny. Was you smoking crack this morning?
AM: What?
MC: You heard me you must have been smoking crack!
AM: So, I can get it daddy? (She is delusional and he was laughing, so I guess she thought he was joking)
MC: Hell no, was the crack good to you; it must have been if you thought you were getting that suit.
ME: (DYING laughing, and of course, putting my two cents in) I do not see anything wrong with the bathing suit; it is a full bathing suit – just CUT OUTS on the sides.
MC: Oh, okay, so she gave you some too. I do not care what either one of you says, you better, find another bathing suit because she ain’t coming out of here with that one. (Awe, look at him trying to be all rough, and put it down….I like that, he’s getting extras tonight – ya feel me!).

We end up finding a bathing suit that was suitable to all of our standards, and we confirmed that the child was a little delusional and not on the pipe.

Shopping for the Eighth Grade Prom is tonight cannot wait!!

Fast Ass

This little treasure was sitting in my inbox this morning and I could not believe it. What this little girl is doing in this video is what my mother calls being a fast ass. That is my mothers term for little girls that act like their older, a little fresh if you will. WELL, I must show her this video. I don't want to hear about "in their culture" and all that, because she is rocking a little extra when she gets on the ground. And why did it take so long for her dad to get her? I guess he figured she better make that money first, then grab her.



Well, I just got one damn question......do she give lessons?

Hey Urb, how are you?

Let me think about that loaded question? You know I can curse like a sailor, but I won't I will just show you a picture and you can just imagine the words I am using. My week is going a little something like this.....

Do you knitty people know what this is?

Well, let me just tell you. That is my knitpick needles with my special project that has a gazillion stitches on it and it broke this morning while I was standing up knitting on the freaking train. I have been contemplating jail time since Monday, wondering if I have friends or family that will spend their stimulus check on me so I don't have to be in the cell with Big Bertha, if I strangle my employer. You know just a little, not a lot, but you know there are implications there so.....
The weather has been PMSing, don't know if it wants to rain, or be sunny.

Anywho, this has been my week, so far.

Are you serious? No Really.... are you?

On Memorial Day, I decided I would surprise my husband and help dig up the back yard while he was at work. Well let me tell you. I am not the damn digging type, I think I was out there all of 10 minutes and quit! I am telling you I would have been in the house making babies for Massa, for real!!

While I was out back I noticed my neighbor and would have liked to say Hi, through the fence, but have decided after a year and a half being in the house that I did not want to keep trying to say hi to a woman who is determined not to speak back. So, I went to the front of the house to pull weed and water/feed the Lillie's that have not bloomed like the Lillie's in the back yard.

My mom stayed over the house this weekend. While I was working my mom and her shadow (Mr. Stefon) came out of the house and said they were going to the store, and I heard my mom say I am doing fine and you? I am looking around trying to figure out who in the world she is talking to over my shoulder. Well people I was shocked it was my next door neighbor and she was all cheesing, looking nice. I am like hold up, that's odd. So, I go in the house and get some mullah so I can get something too and I stop my mom in the garage and am like. She must respect her elders or high, because that woman goes out of her way not to speak, she must like you.

BACKGROUND: Her husband/boyfriend that USE to live with her ALWAYS spoke, and she would make it her business to try and turn her head or act like she did not see anyone. In the beginning I gave her the benefit of the doubt, then my husband started saying the same thing. We have never done anything to this woman, so whatever. But at the end of the day she has a right not to speak. Well, we noticed that her husband/boyfriend has not been there the last month, almost two. I assume he is gone, who knows, who cares.

Now back to the scheduled program: My mom and son leave and I am watering the flowers. I hear, um, excuse me since your watering the flowers - hold on to your horses - Since your watering the flowers I assume you live here!!! Yes, you read it right.

So, I am looking at her, like...Lord, is she special? she sound it? naw, WTF.

People, you will be so proud of me. I had all types of zingers I was ready to throw at this bitches head, but I didn't. What I did do was laugh and smile because if I didn't Professional Urban was about to be Ghetto Urban. It was an awkward moment me looking at her, her looking at me, not saying shit. And then I just said. Hi, my name is Urban, I would shake your hand but it is dirty and then she said, so is mine, my name is La.Fuckup and for fun, I said what? She repeated it. and I said excuse me? and she repeated. I heard her ass, the first time but I had to.

She then says, I have been meaning to come over and say Hi, I should be ashamed of myself after all this time (so evidently she knew who I was). She said she travels a lot and that her and the guy who use to own our house use to look out for each other when they were on travel, take out each other trash and all that good stuff and I look at her and said yeah, THAT IS WHAT NEIGHBORS ARE FOR!!.

My summation. Dude is no longer in the house and she wants someone to watch her shit while she is gone. Guess what people? No problem, because we always looked out for their house. We knew when their ass was traveling and shit. Also, I grew up the neighborly way. My stepdad use to cut the neighbors grass when he cut ours and shovel their snow.

I just can't get past - since your watering the flowers, I assume you live here. Maybe she didn't know a better ice breaker.....like, um. Hi, we haven't been properly introduced, my name is Dumbass.

Great weekend and a small world

Man, I had a ball this weekend. I went to Linganore Winecellars for their annual Caribbean Wine Festival and I went to a bday party. Great times. So, lets start with the wine festival.

First off, let me start off by saying that someone did not read my post about drinking too much and fighting. I saw two people fall out and this time two girls were fighting. One bust the other one upside the head with a wine bottle - oh and 1/2 the wine was still in the bottle. What a waste! One lady walked by and said give me my Jack Daniels any day, you people do not know how to act with wine (told ya). P.S. it was not one of us.... I heard someone say that they were fighting because one slept with the other husband. SIDEBAR - this has always been a problem for me, why are the women fighting? Fuck him up, HE is the one made the promises, not her. Geez, I am not fighting for Mr. Conservative, unless it is family - why because both of them made a promise, chica off the street, no ma'am.

The positives. It was a girls/ladies whatever day out. So, we got up, got our food and hit the road. Mr. Conservative was a little upset because we like to do "first" together, but he had to work and it is good to get out of the house minus the spouse sometimes. AND, we are going to the Jazz and Reggae one so he will be straight.

Small world, so we are more than an hour away, and we are about to go on a wine tour and I say to my gf, wow that sounds like my Godmother/Aunt. And I say, huh, she does have blonde dreads, but I have never seen her drink anything but water. Well, I walk over and act like I am buying something and sure nuff, it was my godmommy. Oh and she is a regular to the winery and I am in awe, because, again, never seen her drink anything. Fun times.

Here are a couple of folks listening to the music and the tent folks were smart, because the sun was out.

On Sunday, my godsister had a cookout for her sister bday, she turned 34 too and her brother was there and upset that he had to leave the next day (he is in the service). WE had a ball, we were dancing to Chuck Brown and started a soul train line and we had Crabs (which are helluva expensive right now $198 a bushel) and everything else.

Birthday girl is getting her groove on and that is my mommy in the dress.

Look at my flowers people!!! I am so stoked!! My Lillie's and Roses have come out in the backyard (thank God). I have lilies in the front, but they have not bloomed yet, which is a good thing, because someone probably will cut them (fuckers).




Oh and I have a new rule to add to the DO's and DON'T list.
Do dress according to the weather and wine festival.
Don't wear white a white shirt and miss your lips while drinking red wine! (that would be me, too busy observing people and missed my soup coolers DAYHUM!

Did I tell you I cut my hair - well this is an old picture, my hair is even shorter and my hair is colored in the front and I LOVE it.

Wine Festival

Last weekend I went to Wine in the Woods a wine festival. I had a ball ya'll. There is nothing like good food, wine and friends - oh and Mr. Stefon. We had to take him, because the other two had plans - dayum.

Anywho, I got to sample some local wines (and buy some) and had one of the best crab cakes, don't let no one fool you, Maryland makes the best crab cakes. What would have really set it off would have been some yarn for sale. There was artisans there, and I bought some of their wares.

THE best part of the festival - the end. Why, you ask? Because people don't know their damn limit!!

Here's a little do's and don'ts of a Wine Festival.

DO get a designated driver, if you know your going to drink the whole entire time.
DON'T drink your weight in wine and then think you can walk. Man ol man, we were DYING with laughter, people were falling slam out. And Mr. Stefon had the best line, why he say, I guess somebody forgot to spit!!! Oh Man, I thought I would wet my pants. Another lady fell slam out, in the mud (it has been rainy bad here) face first, gf was knocked out, her husband had to fireman carry her. Not a good luck at all, but funny as all get out (she wasn't hurt). Okay, one more. The last one I went to the lady was walking with her kids and she could not go straight. Her husband, was like I can't bring her no where and the kids were staring. We were cracking up - oh and the police was giving people "voluntary" breathalyzers. Some needed to take that test.

DO bring chairs, blankets, leashes for your kids and good eats if your not buying anything.
DON'T drink bottles at a time and then want to fight. Every wine festival I go to at the end they want to fight and it is normally the frat boys. Of course, Mr. Stefon spotted this one - Daddy, look, that man just picked up a bottle and about to hit him over the head. Sure nuff, he was. Last one I went to, same thing except they really got scruffing, all I heard was, "We need Officers at the front" damn shame. I looked at our group and was like - hell, they said don't give any brown to black people, I think we need to look into whites and wine.

DO wear comfortable shoes and be ready to have a good time, especially if you are buying food, because the lines were packed for food, I mean like an hour wait.
DON'T wear six inch heels when you know the shit is outside and it has been raining for weeks. Dirt+Water=Mud and you busting your ass.

DO volunteer if you have the time.
DON'T volunteer if you are going to be drinking the wine like their shots. Man oh man, this one chic that was helping, I swear she was going one for you 3 for me. People in line, were like damn, is she suppose to be doing that? I mean, she was taking it back to back.

DO go around to the local winery's and try the wines, that is what you paid for and is therefore.
DON'T drink up everything just because it is free. KNOW YOUR FUCKING LIMIT, many see free and just go for it.

One last one.
DO try new stuff - hey again, that is what your there for.
DON'T ever in your life try Chocolate Zinfandel, as I stated everything was free to sample, except special shit. They had the Chocolate Zinfandel for $1 and I was not going to pay for it because it didn't sound like my thing. My friend got in line to get it and this girl over to the side was talking to me and telling me it is ssssooooo good, like she just had an orgasm, so I'm like hell I want one. SHIT, should have followed my instincts, she must work for the damn place, my friend and i spit ours out at the same time.

Here is my wine and my most prized possession, my wine glass holder. Put it around your neck and bam you don't have to carry it. I got it at my first wine festival and I got stopped numerous times, my husband broke his (truth be told, that was actually mine...ssshh). So, I tried to get him another but they didn't have them at this one.

Me wearing my best friend.


My wine glass and holder and Precious tried to sneak in the picture.


Beauty is her name!



This weekend I will be attending the Caribbean Wine Festival at Linganore Wineries, I am so stoked because this will be my first visit to a winery. Oh boy! Can some say DESIGNATED DRIVER! Not it, you know I don't drive.

What do you have planned this holiday weekend?

Conversations with Urb

Mommy Dearest & I

That good ole holiday – Mother’s Day, came and I wanted to buy my mother some clothes, but I needed her size. So, I called her.

Me: Mommy, what size do you wear?
Mother Dearest: Why?
Me: Because I want to know. (as if it wasn’t obvious)
Mother Dearest: Get me a size 12/14.
Me: Mommy, I am not buying you a 12, you are too small. (me to self, she is smaller than me she has to be a 6).
MD: I know what I want get me a 12/14
Me: I am not buying that, look you are smaller than me. If I wear a 8 (depends) or 10 you have to swear a size smaller than me.
MD: (Laughter) Who wear a 10? Your ass wear a 14/16.

Silence

MD: Hello
Me: I have never worn a 14/16, where do you get that from.
MD: Well it looks like it, I have to look at you again.

What the fuck? I always go through this shit with my mother and sister. By the way, they have always been bigger then me. I used to be a 0, and no I was not sick or anything, just didn’t gain shit. I was a 0 until I had Mr. Stefon and then I went to a 6 and have fluctuated between an 8/10 and when I am about to go to a 12 diet like mad or exercise. My sister is fat. Cutie, but fat. I say that to say, she should never worry about my weight, but she do. I don’t care about size, but with them you would think I was the biggest person walking this earth.

Mr. Stefon & Urb

Mr. Stefon lost his metro pass. I pay $26 for the month for him to catch the train and bus unlimited for the month. If you lose the pass your short. Well he lost his and I know it is in his room somewhere. So this morning on the way to school, I said something about the pass again.

Me: We would have more stuff to bring on our trip if you didn’t loose your pass, and I didn’t have to shell out extra money (me and him might go on a date this weekend to the monument)
Mr. Stefon: Mommy you are making me feel bad.
Me: How?
MS: You keep talking about the pass
Me: I’m going to keep talking abut the pass do you know how much it cost, If we don’t have the pass, I pay 6 dollars a day for you that is 30 dollars in a week, 120 for the month.
Mr. Stefon: Well you told me to tell you when you make me feel bad and you will stop.
Me: Did I have a glass in my hand? Because I am going to keep talking about it until you find it. Have a nice day at school sweetie – oh and look in your locker and see if it is in there.

Furthermore, the boy don’t feel bad. He said that after I told him I am not buying a video game, because the money for the game is being spent on his travels.

Urb & the cleaning lady

Me and the cleaning lady chit chatting talking about life.

Cleaning Lady: I love your hair, it looks so nice.
Me: Thank you
CL: You should keep your hair short like that and the color is nice.
Me: Thank you
CL: Are you pregnant
Me: Um, no….
CL: You are just glowing and beautiful girl, keep on doing what cha doing.
Me: Ah, thank you – what I wanted to say – Maybe, I look like this because my husband was laying pipe 2 in the a.m., but, but um, I didn’t and I will keep on doing what we were doing!

Its my birfday!!

Blogger was acting up, so I had to split the post.

So, my bday resolution for 34 is to complete all the resolutions I did not complete last year and I want to add a few more.

v Gain knowledge on a business venture I want to start and to take steps to making a business plan.

v Join Professional Association

v Politics, politics – love it!! Need to attend more functions that I am invited to.

v Get a new job.

v Spend more time with Mr. Stefon, and try to exercise some patients (prayer).

v Family trip

v Read at least three classics.

v Organize house projects

Biggest accomplishment of year 33 was watching my oldest child, College Boy, attend his senior prom, graduate high school and attend college.

Goals reached at year 33

HELLO 34!!

Well peeps it is official, I am 34 years old. Let’s see what I have accomplished during my 33^rd year on this planet.

• Get into somebodys damn Master Program, this was on the list last year and as you can see I did not complete it. Technically, I did receive the admission papers to attend Catholic in the fall
• Do a new resume, everyone needs an updated one. (Completed Federal & Private)
• Date my kids more - especially my daughter (13 and is starting to develop - need I say more) and the 8 year old - my 17 year old and I are already close. (Sure did, they are now 14, 9 and 18)
• For the husband keep everything as is, we have a wonderful relationship, so I don't want to change anything there, he respects me and I respect him. So keep doing whatever I have been doing. (Yes ma’am, surely did and I have a closet full of……)
• Exercise more and I am going to set a goal of losing 30 lbs. (I ran consistently for a while and am off track, so no I did not lose 30 but I did lose something. Can’t tell you what because I do not weigh myself, but a lot of people say it look like I lost something)
• Drive more. I AM GOING TO DRIVE TODAY (we will see) I did drive more, but still need to make it a habit and not 3 times a year.
• Continue to save money and try to stick to a budget. Please, I was so bad, did not do.
• More me time (please) Again, did not do.
• Travel more Nope
• Swim more Nope
• Read classics, expand my reading. I already read a lot, but I would like to go back and read some of the classics. I did read more, even if it was close to the end and the classic – Anna Karenina, I think that counts.
• Expand knitting technique (double knitting, dying, steeking, etc...), um, I know I did more than I have before so yeah and I started a blanket.
• Learn to crochet. Child please, did not start and it is a damn shame because I bought all the needles and book 2 years ago.

Birthday Eve

Well, well. I am getting older folks and I am not kicking and screaming today. I am actually looking forward to it, because let me tell you. Birthday 29 - 30 was pure drama. I was depressed like hell. And then all of a sudden I started looking forward to bday 31 (everyone was happy).

So, today is my daddys bday and his brother (my grandparents must have LUV that day - ugh, sick, don't want to think about that any more).

Any who today is the last day I will be 33 and tomorrow I will be brining in 34. Oh and I will post my 34 year old revolution. Here is last years goals for 33 that I posted or you can see the entire post here:

Okay, so what are my goals for 33

• Get into somebodys damn Master Program, this was on the list last year and as you can see I did not complete it.
• Do a new resume, everyone needs an updated one.
• Date my kids more - especially my daughter (13 and is starting to develop - need I say more) and the 8 year old - my 17 year old and I are already close.
• For the husband keep everything as is, we have a wonderful relationship, so I don't want to change anything there, he respects me and I respect him. So keep doing whatever I have been doing.
• Exercise more and I am going to set a goal of losing 30 lbs.
• Drive more. I AM GOING TO DRIVE TODAY (we will see)
• Continue to save money and try to stick to a budget.
• More me time (please)
• Travel more
• Swim more
• Read classics, expand my reading. I already read a lot, but I would like to go back and read some of the classics.
• Expand knitting technique (double knitting, dying, steeking, etc...)
• Learn to crochet.

Okay enough already, let me get started on this damn list.

Oh and let me say HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY DAD!!! His birthday was yesterday. He told me when I was little that I was his present. Please!! We will go there another day with my father.

A Lacy Bolero and Herbs

Yes, you read the post right. I actually have another knit project finished (singing stuntin like my mutha)!!

I finished the Ribbed Lace Bolero by Kelley Maher AKA Springtime, on April 19th, but did not have a chance to take a picture (lazy). Well Ms. Anger Mgmt is going on a field trip today and wanted to wear it, so I made her take a picture early this morning (so no she is not wearing it with what she has on it's her pj's). I will try and get a better shot later. I used Knitpicks 10 1/2 and 8 needles. Lion Brand Cottonease - lake (1 skein and a little of the second). A very easy knit. Without further ado:



This weekend I went to the U.S. National Arboretum. When you come to D.C. you should really visit it is so pretty. Once a year they have a sale on the plants and herbs they have been growing through out the year at a discount price. Well I was overwhelmed with the flower selection, so we decided to start a little herb garden: Rosemary, Pepper Mint, Apple Mint, Jalapeno Hot Peppers, Peppers - Mildly Hot, and Basil. I reached for the Habernos and my husband said hell no (I'll tell you that story another day). I can't wait to plant them, but the experts told me to wait because of the shifting weather here.

Rosemary close up