Wednesday, July 15, 2009

You are the weakest Mom - good-bye!

Anger Mgmt: What is for dinner?

Mr. Conservative and I, act like we do not hear her. As far as I am concerned, she is not talking to me because she was not specific, so I did not answer her.

Anger Mgmt: Mommy (all damn!), what’s for dinner?

I am now faking sleep on the couch and Mr. Conservative is on the computer.

Anger Mgmt: Mommy I know your not sleep, I just saw your eyes open when I came down the steps.

Urban: I was sleep, what do you want.

Anger mgmt: Yeah right. What are we eating for dinner?

Urban: I do not know. Why are you asking me? You have a father. I do not feel like cooking. Make a sandwich or something or we may go get something.

Mr. Conservative: I am tired too; you had better make a sandwich.

Anger mgmt: A sandwich? I am tired of sandwiches.

Urban: I am tired leave me a lone at least you have a sandwich to eat (remember when your parents use to say that). I said, we might go and get something fast to eat.

Anger mgmt: Do you two ever plan on cooking again? Ya’ll do not cook any more. Especially, you mommy. I mean is this new.

Urban: What? I do cook. Right now, it is hard for me with school.

Anger mgmt: Mommy you have been out of school for over a month (this convo took place in June).

Urban: That is beside the point. That is my story and I am sticking to it.

Anger mgmt: Seriously mommy, do you plan on cooking ever again, because I am tired of this stuff.

Urban: First off, you have two parents, and where is it written that I have to cook? How come you are not saying this to daddy, he is right over there. And second, you would think you would be happy with the fast food. Most kids like fast food.

Anger Mgmt: (trying to whisper) You know daddy can’t cook and fast food is good once in a while but you get tired of it.

Urban: Well I believe you are 15 and should be cooking too. I was cooking at 10, so you need to cook more. Right now, I am busy at work and will try and cook. But when I am tired, I am tired.

Kids!! Look. I have been tired as hell. We are two years behind on our audit at work and we have been changing our accounting system MORE than once because I am working with crazy people. So, I have been working more. Also, that is a damn excuse. I have got comfortable with not cooking. Feels quite good by the way, but I do feel guilty sometimes when I do not cook and they give me this look like AGAIN – or smart ass Anger Mgmt comments - I guess I won’t eat. But you see it’s a rhythm, like exercising and I have gotten out of my routine and guess what I LOVE IT!! However, she is right. Fast food is good every now and again, but after awhile it gets boring, nasty and costly. I think one week we ate out 5 out of 7 days and then followed the same trend the next week.

Like I said this conversation happened in June. It is now July. Does that mean I am back to cooking every damn day of the week? Um, no, she is not my mother and I am still on mother/cooking vacation damn it. Although, I do run the risk of getting voted off the family island and I am pretty sure the little misses is forming alliances with her brothers. They have begun to complain – there is no food in the fridge. Um, yes it is you need to COOK IT – College boy, come on man.

Oh and their dad still gets an easy out, because they are scared of him. Famous line from the kids – you know daddy do not care. He is just going to look at us like were crazy. Um, that is what I am going to start doing – I thought I was, but I guess I need to start practicing my mean mugging look in the mirror.

You are the weakest mom, good-bye.

4 comments:

Sheila said...

And I thought I was the only one on a cooking and exercise break....lol. My daughter... who is 21 years old had nerve to say... you need to get your cooking skills back b/c I'm tired of oodle noodles..haha

gold said...

OMG I here you!!!!! My kids could tell their dad that they are hungry and he would say okay!! Six hours later when I get home,Mom we are hungry! I would ask what did your dad do! He keep saying okay ! If I did that they would be following me around the house until I get something or cook something!!

Sha Boogie said...

is this what I have to look forward too when my child starts talking? I don't want it! lol

stillpatrice said...

lmao!!! yall are nuts in that house. lol